I just had a pretty powerful revelation about the importance of introspection. It was in that moment of waking, just on the edge of a bout of low-blood-sugar shakes. There's a definitive correlation between spiritual awakenings and seizures and I wonder, is it really just a chemical sensation as scientists claim, or is it that the touch of something so much more powerful sends the body into a state of nervous shock. Because while I can understand that a chemical sensation could cause both a seizure and the feeling that some godlike hand had touched you, how could nothing but a cascade of chemicals also induce wisdom, lessons, and even full-blown parables as they have done from time to time? So here's today's bit of wisdom, about why it is important to look inward at yourself, whether through therapy or meditation, to be honest with yourself, to see yourself as you really are but without judging.
The end result of this lesson is it is okay to not work on an issue, so long as you make that choice knowingly. Because that is confusing, I have an example.
Let's say you hum when you are thinking or working. In the first scenario, you are introspective. You know that you hum, and you have decided that you don't mind this little foible of your personality. It's not something you want to change about yourself. You have accepted it. However, you work in a cubicle farm. The neighbor next to you is driven to distraction by your humming and one day he finally comes over and tells you how annoying your humming is to him. Because you have no desire to change this habit and are secure within yourself, you tell him that while you are sorry he is disturbed by your habit, you have no intention of changing it. You suggest he invest in earplugs or an iPod, or maybe he should play some soft music on his computer if your humming bothers him so much. It is just how you are and it helps you to be productive and think.
In the second scenario, you were again introspective and knew that you liked to hum, but you viewed it as a habit you did not like and wanted to change. You thanked the coworker when he brought forth his complaint, apologized and told him about your struggle to change this bad habit. Maybe you enlisted his aide in assisting you. He would alert you if he noticed you humming.
In both of the above scenarios, because you had self-knowledge, the decision of whether or not to change was solely your own. Either way, you were moving toward the person you wanted to be. You are self-evolving.
Now, if we try the same situation again, only all this time you had no idea you liked to hum when you worked.
COWORKER: I'm getting really sick and tired of you humming all the time. It's making it impossible for me to think over here, let alone get any work done.
YOU: Humming? Me?
COWORKER: Who else am I talking to? You hum all the time!
YOU: I do?
COWORKER: Yes! And I really can't take it any more. It's driving me crazy.
Over the next couple of days, you agonize over whether or not you hum, how many people are you annoying, are other people equally annoyed, etc. You haven't accepted yourself because you don't know yourself, so how can possibly be secure within yourself.
When you don't know yourself, the choices about the kind of person you become are influenced by other people. In the above instance, you are more likely to decide that humming is an annoying habit that you have which needs to be changed, based on the opinion of someone else. But lets say your first awareness of this habit had been someone saying, "I love how cheerful you always are in the office, you're always humming a little tune and smiling. It makes my day a little brighter." In that instance, you might decide that humming is a pleasant habit that others enjoy.
But in either instance, the decision is no longer yours. Because you were not self-aware, because you were brought to awareness by another person, the decision about the kind of person you are going to be has now been influenced by that other person's opinion. This is why it is of vital importance to be self-aware. It is also why it is important to try our very best to be non-judgmental of others. Respect each other; allow their souls to bloom as fit. I've been told this is going to be very important in the coming days.
And, if my 'chemicals' are to be believed, this is the true meaning behind "Judge not, lest ye be judged."
Blessings to all, to we the sinners. My humble thanks to the Great Aum for the guidance I have received this day. May I be strong enough to carry this wisdom. May I not stumble where I am weak.