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Wed, Oct. 31st, 2012, 07:05 pm
I'd Like To Say There's A Magic Pill

I'd like to say there's a magic pill that I could give you or sell you and have you get better. I'd like to say there's a method or a path. In addition to sleeping 14-16 hours a day (still adjusting to medication), which certainly cuts into blogging time, I've suddenly veered off onto a new path. I've taken a step, one in which I'm not sure you can follow.

It's not a step up. It's more of a side-step. I'm not even sure it is the right direction. For awhile, it seemed, we were all traveling together on a highway of generalities and pretty much all the problems had the basic things be the same, but suddenly I've turned off the highway. I'm headed home, to my home, and not only am I not sure you could follow as you don't have the relevant directions, but I don't know if you should. After all, what good would it do you to get to my house? That's not where you want to be. And I'm not even sure I'm going the right direction; right now I'm lost in the woods. I could be going in circles. I think I'm headed the right way. It's starting to feel familiar, at any rate.

A part of me thinks I should wait to see if I really do get home, and then try to remember how I managed to find my path, and maybe share some tips that I think would be helpful. The rest of me realizes that if I don't write it down now, I'm never going to remember all that once I get there. But, and here's the rub, what if I'm NOT headed the right direction? If I write it down now, and this isn't the correct way, I certainly don't want to lead anyone astray.

So a word of warning is in order. I'm venturing into a place of specificity. What is healing to me might not be healing for you, and I'm not even sure this is good for me. I won't know until I try it whether or not it works. I haven't given up though, and whatever else is true, I don't think you should give up either.

This is technically a 'recovery week' schedule, where I analyze bad habits etc. I haven't made much with the schedules because I've been sleeping so much, but it's been getting better (from 20 hours a day to 15 lol). The next official recovery week starts Sunday, November 18th. I will have a follow-along schedule posted before then if you'd like to try something similar to my points system. Modify it however you want. I'll explain it later. Peace!

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